march journal
4/20/22
When I meet someone that possesses a rich body of knowledge that is completely outside of my frame of reference, I admittedly have mixed emotions of curiosity and jealousy. In response to others’ expertise, I often make comments like “how do you know this?”, which I have come to realize is a selfish question rooted in jealousy. Questions like this don’t uplift and validate one’s wisdom, instead, it’s a shortcut to acquiring a similar set of knowledge and can make that person feel discredited. We often view others’ growth as a threat to our own success, which only perpetuates the problem. What if instead we celebrated strangers’ achievements and viewed one another as allies - all working to achieve our best selves.
Whether we like it or not, the questions that we ask reflect the type of person that we are. Questions are one of the ways that we connect with people and what keep (or halt) the momentum of conversations. When we pause to think about the type of person we wish to become, we must also give thought to how this may be lived out through our interactions. Rather than going through life in a self-serving place, we should make space for others to share their uniqueness and be celebrated along the way.
This past month I set the intention to “be inspired by others”. By adopting this mindset, I began to see the beauty of my surroundings more clearly, without the involvement of self-comparison. By showing up as people’s biggest cheerleaders, you not only allow others to be heard and seen, but you also have the chance to learn the context of their journey. This is the clear difference of a conversation rooted in curiosity vs jealousy. The questions that you pose from a place of curiosity allow you to immerse in the “why”, leading to inspiring conversations. These are the conversations that spark motivation in us farther down the road to take leaps and follow our light.
March was a special opportunity to be playful with a “beginner’s mind”. Shoshin (beginners mind) is a word from Zen Buddhism which means openness, eagerness, and lack of preconceptions. It is the idea that “if your mind is empty, it is always ready for anything and is open to everything”. It is the same reason why children are quick learners and the most curious creatures. They learn the most because the word “why” is a natural unapologetic reflex that allows them to dig deeper. I’ve noticed that many of us have a difficult time admitting that we don’t know or ask for help. We attach shame to the unknown and prioritize protecting our ego over the vulnerability it takes to learn. But the good news is that we can detach from the shame of the unknown by welcoming the concept of a beginner’s mind. Every day, encounter, and experience has something new to offer if you will allow it. Carving out time to celebrate others is a beautiful and critical gift that we must start giving to others and ourselves.